GUIDLINES FROM THE CENTER OF THE UNIVERSE

August 16, 2006

By JESSICA CHAPMAN
The Kaselehlie Press

I have begun to notice that a great number of us are struggling to be the center of the universe. As a community service this will be the first in a series of columns dedicated to helping you in your quest to gain your proper place at the absolute center of the universe. If you are already nearly at the center these first guidelines will be a bit too basic and I apologize in advance for this. It never hurts to go back to the basics.

Driving
Sakau and Betlenut-both Sakau en Pohnpei and Sakau en Wai

I only have room for one more guideline though there are so many more. Practice these for the next two weeks when I'll give you some slightly more advanced guidelines.

Bonus guideline: Never forget that lines (queues) are only for those with orbits somewhere near Pluto, or maybe just a bit beyond that. People at the center of the universe don't have time for lines.

That's it from the center of the universe until next time.

Bill Jaynes
Managing Editor and
Center of the Universe